I still remember the first time I called a therapist to ask for help. These moments are painful yet so brave. Are you wanting to make peace with food yet stuck on your own? Or, are you meeting with a therapist yet needing more intensive treatment? How do you know what is the best next step? Listen to the latest Love Food Podcast for ideas to help you decide. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Take the Love Food Survey: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">click here</a>. Do you own a social justice informed and fat positive business? I would love to give you the opportunity to advertise on the Love Food Podcast. Get all the details <a href= "http://www.juliedillonrd.com/LoveFoodSponsor">here</a>. Dear Food, My wish every single morning is to just have one day...one day where I do not eat you, enjoy you, and then panic and get rid of you. It has been 6 years and I have not gone one day without engaging in X behaviors. I am tired. I am sick. I am 36 years old and have no friends, no children of my own, and also have almost no hope that I will be able to stop this terrible cycle. I have osteoporosis, low potassium, anemia, dental problems, low vitamin d, a damaged retina, and many other medical complications from what I do with you everyday. It’s so weird. I love you- flavor, texture, the artistry of flavor combinations, the creativity...but I am terrified of you too. Terrified of what effect you will have on my body...terrified that I will love you so much, that I won’t be able to stop...terrified because I am using you as a distraction to stop thinking about extensive childhood trauma. I am 36 and our relationship is no longer so helpful. I use you for the wrong reasons...I wish I could use you for nourishment and not as a means of unhealthy coping. I am faced with the need to attend treatment but I am so scared. We have to meet 6 times a day. We have to sit together and just “be.” I have to use you to help heal me even though currently I hate me. You will be my medicine and hopefully we can become true friends.  I am faced with the decision, Food. Do I go? Do I hope that together we can work through this? Can we do it? Do I even matter enough to try?  I do know that I can’t keep doing this Food. I just can’t. I need to hear from you that you will be there for me in the right ways. That I can learn to exist with you in a healthy way. I am so ashamed, lonely, and really just desperate to have a new relationship with you. I just need a little hope, a little reassurance that things will get better. I can’t see a way out out of this now, but hopefully with your promise that this is possible, I can be more things than I am now. I can be strong. I can be recovered. I can be a mother. I can be a friend. I live instead of just  existing. I can be proud.  Sincerely, Wanting Something More Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

I still remember the first time I called a therapist to ask for help. These moments are painful yet so brave. Are you wanting to make peace with food yet stuck on your own? Or, are you meeting with a therapist yet needing more intensive treatment? How do you know what is the best next step? Listen to the latest Love Food Podcast for ideas to help you decide. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Take the Love Food Survey: click here. Do you own a social justice informed and fat positive business? I would love to give you the opportunity to advertise on the Love Food Podcast. Get all the details here. Dear Food, My wish every single morning is to just have one day...one day where I do not eat you, enjoy you, and then panic and get rid of you. It has been 6 years and I have not gone one day without engaging in X behaviors. I am tired. I am sick. I am 36 years old and have no friends, no children of my own, and also have almost no hope that I will be able to stop this terrible cycle. I have osteoporosis, low potassium, anemia, dental problems, low vitamin d, a damaged retina, and many other medical complications from what I do with you everyday. It’s so weird. I love you- flavor, texture, the artistry of flavor combinations, the creativity...but I am terrified of you too. Terrified of what effect you will have on my body...terrified that I will love you so much, that I won’t be able to stop...terrified because I am using you as a distraction to stop thinking about extensive childhood trauma. I am 36 and our relationship is no longer so helpful. I use you for the wrong reasons...I wish I could use you for nourishment and not as a means of unhealthy coping. I am faced with the need to attend treatment but I am so scared. We have to meet 6 times a day. We have to sit together and just “be.” I have to use you to help heal me even though currently I hate me. You will be my medicine and hopefully we can become true friends.  I am faced with the decision, Food. Do I go? Do I hope that together we can work through this? Can we do it? Do I even matter enough to try?  I do know that I can’t keep doing this Food. I just can’t. I need to hear from you that you will be there for me in the right ways. That I can learn to exist with you in a healthy way. I am so ashamed, lonely, and really just desperate to have a new relationship with you. I just need a little hope, a little reassurance that things will get better. I can’t see a way out out of this now, but hopefully with your promise that this is possible, I can be more things than I am now. I can be strong. I can be recovered. I can be a mother. I can be a friend. I live instead of just  existing. I can be proud.  Sincerely, Wanting Something More Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

The Love Food Podcast

(213) I need help.

Have you heard that we need to eat more veggies, herbs, and stock up on Essential Oils while surviving this pandemic? Don't believe the Wellness Diet hype. The number one thing you can do right now--social distance, wash your hands, and NOT diet. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">JulieDillonRD.com/Survey</a>. Mary wrote in: What is triggering me right now and threatening to cause me to grab hold of the "wellness" diet again (which led to orthorexia for me) are the emails, newsletter, posts, about how important it is to eat healthfully right now. For instance, up the "super greens" like kale and chard and lettuces and fruits and veggies. This is a catch 22. On the one had we are being told to eat fresh fruits and veggies and greens and on the other hand we are told to avoid people, to self-isolate. I can't keep my greens longer than a few days nor do I have a garden or live in an area that has fruits and vegetables available at outside markets all year long, so the only way to get the is to do what they say not to do: go to grocery stores. I know I can just unsubscribe and not read, but there is a tiny part of me that is saying, "but what if they are right" and the HAES and intuitive eating people are wrong? Again, another part of my disordered eating thinking. Thank you! Mary Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li>Julie on Instagram: @FoodPeaceDietitian</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitian</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Have you heard that we need to eat more veggies, herbs, and stock up on Essential Oils while surviving this pandemic? Don't believe the Wellness Diet hype. The number one thing you can do right now--social distance, wash your hands, and NOT diet. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: JulieDillonRD.com/Survey. Mary wrote in: What is triggering me right now and threatening to cause me to grab hold of the "wellness" diet again (which led to orthorexia for me) are the emails, newsletter, posts, about how important it is to eat healthfully right now. For instance, up the "super greens" like kale and chard and lettuces and fruits and veggies. This is a catch 22. On the one had we are being told to eat fresh fruits and veggies and greens and on the other hand we are told to avoid people, to self-isolate. I can't keep my greens longer than a few days nor do I have a garden or live in an area that has fruits and vegetables available at outside markets all year long, so the only way to get the is to do what they say not to do: go to grocery stores. I know I can just unsubscribe and not read, but there is a tiny part of me that is saying, "but what if they are right" and the HAES and intuitive eating people are wrong? Again, another part of my disordered eating thinking. Thank you! Mary Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Julie on Instagram: @FoodPeaceDietitian Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitian near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(212) Immunity--Veggies, Herbs, and Oils or The Wellness Diet

Have you been feeling more anxious, fearful, powerless? Me too. You don't have to ignore these feelings because they can inform you and me. You are already braver then you think. I hope this episode helps you feel more powerful for the weeks ahead. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">JulieDillonRD.com/Survey</a>. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li>Julie on Instagram: @FoodPeaceDietitian</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitian</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Have you been feeling more anxious, fearful, powerless? Me too. You don't have to ignore these feelings because they can inform you and me. You are already braver then you think. I hope this episode helps you feel more powerful for the weeks ahead. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: JulieDillonRD.com/Survey. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Julie on Instagram: @FoodPeaceDietitian Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitian near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(211) Do not tell me to calm down

Do you feel possessed at times with the chaos that a binge brings? Have you tried everything to change your eating behavior yet feel addicted?? This episode's letter writer is from a concerned family member worried about their parent's on and off relationship with food. I have a feel you can relate. Listen here now to hear all the details and a way through. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Take the Love Food Survey: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">click here</a>. Dear Food, I know you and I still have work to do, but I'm writing today to talk to you about your relationship with my dad (hope you don't mind!). He knows so much about you, and he's tried so many diets and plans, but he just can't stick with eating in a healthy way. He's had a number of health problems related to his weight and diet, and has to take about a dozen prescription pills a day to address his GI issues. He says he wants to change, and wants to take better care of himself - but for years now, he and our family have watched helplessly as the motivation wanes after a week or two, disappears for months, and then shows back up full-force. It's been exhausting for everyone to see this cycle over and over again. He even has the self-awareness to see what works for him, what doesn't, why he might be giving up, what psycho-emotional factors are at play - but all that self-reflection doesn't turn into action (and he knows that, too!) He's even joked that he feels "possessed" when he binges on sugar and snacks, or that his brain and his tongue aren't communicating, and that "it's time to go back on that plan again."He and the rest of us thought that after he had to be hospitalized for the GI issue, it would be enough motivation - but he went back to old habits quickly. We've tried cooking together, affirmations, journaling, listing all the great things that will come with healthy eating. He's seen nutritionists and psychologists, he's tried meditating and going to the gym. But even with the support, motivation, experts, and health care professionals, he hasn't been able to make the changes and progress he wants. Now, his first grandchild is on the way. We love him, we don't want to be intrusive - he's asked for us to help. But we feel powerless, and defeated that we can't help. Food - is it time for him (and us?) to work with a professional? How do we know where to start, and what kind of specialist to look for? He hasn't been diagnosed with an eating disorder - will he need a doctor referral? Will this be another expense and ray of hope that goes nowhere? He wants to heal, and we want to see him love himself as much as we love him. Love, Concerned Daughter Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li><a href="http://goodnessgraciousliving.com/">Beth Rosen</a>--Julie's recommended GI HAES RD.</li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Do you feel possessed at times with the chaos that a binge brings? Have you tried everything to change your eating behavior yet feel addicted?? This episode's letter writer is from a concerned family member worried about their parent's on and off relationship with food. I have a feel you can relate. Listen here now to hear all the details and a way through. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Take the Love Food Survey: click here. Dear Food, I know you and I still have work to do, but I'm writing today to talk to you about your relationship with my dad (hope you don't mind!). He knows so much about you, and he's tried so many diets and plans, but he just can't stick with eating in a healthy way. He's had a number of health problems related to his weight and diet, and has to take about a dozen prescription pills a day to address his GI issues. He says he wants to change, and wants to take better care of himself - but for years now, he and our family have watched helplessly as the motivation wanes after a week or two, disappears for months, and then shows back up full-force. It's been exhausting for everyone to see this cycle over and over again. He even has the self-awareness to see what works for him, what doesn't, why he might be giving up, what psycho-emotional factors are at play - but all that self-reflection doesn't turn into action (and he knows that, too!) He's even joked that he feels "possessed" when he binges on sugar and snacks, or that his brain and his tongue aren't communicating, and that "it's time to go back on that plan again."He and the rest of us thought that after he had to be hospitalized for the GI issue, it would be enough motivation - but he went back to old habits quickly. We've tried cooking together, affirmations, journaling, listing all the great things that will come with healthy eating. He's seen nutritionists and psychologists, he's tried meditating and going to the gym. But even with the support, motivation, experts, and health care professionals, he hasn't been able to make the changes and progress he wants. Now, his first grandchild is on the way. We love him, we don't want to be intrusive - he's asked for us to help. But we feel powerless, and defeated that we can't help. Food - is it time for him (and us?) to work with a professional? How do we know where to start, and what kind of specialist to look for? He hasn't been diagnosed with an eating disorder - will he need a doctor referral? Will this be another expense and ray of hope that goes nowhere? He wants to heal, and we want to see him love himself as much as we love him. Love, Concerned Daughter Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Beth Rosen--Julie's recommended GI HAES RD. Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(210) I feel possessed around food.

Have you been feeling more anxious, fearful, powerless? Me too. I am curious about how this is affecting our relationship with food. I hope this gives you pause and comfort on the road ahead. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">JulieDillonRD.com/Survey</a>. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitian</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Have you been feeling more anxious, fearful, powerless? Me too. I am curious about how this is affecting our relationship with food. I hope this gives you pause and comfort on the road ahead. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: JulieDillonRD.com/Survey. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitian near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(209) Coronavirus and Food

What is it like to eat with others on your Food Peace™ journey? How do you experience the talk about bodies or exercise or where to go to lunch? Do you find yourself comparing yourself to other people and feeling like a failure in comparison? Is this keeping you stuck? Let's discuss in this week's Love Food Podcast with guest Renee Hamati @SensiblyYou on Instagram. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">JulieDillonRD.com/Survey</a>. This episode's Dear Food letter: Dear Food, I have struggled to write this letter for a while now as I couldn’t really think of a good way to organize what went all wrong over the past couple of years. You and I are definitely on better terms by now and I am glad about that. Yet more often than I want to, my past keeps creeping up the back of my head again.  Let me take you back a little, to a time when food had been effortless and easy, enjoyable and pleasurable. I remember that I have always loved you and didn’t really think of any part of you as good or bad. I loved chocolate as much as I loved my broccoli. I had no hard time stopping whenever I was full nor did I give myself a hard time when I overate on occasion. I just shrugged it off and moved on.  I have always been slim since I was a kid and to be honest, I never worried about how my body looked. I loved it for being able to move, to dance, to breathe.  For a little further explanation of the following let me tell you that I have 2 sisters. A twin and an older sister.  We spent much time together as 3 even though my older sister has always been busy with being a good student. Nonetheless we had a good relationship … until over time she grew distant and cold, irritated for seemingly no reason. We noticed her eating behavior changing. Long story short, everything ended with her being so deep into Anorexia that she had to be force-fed in the recovery clinic. Even after her stay in the clinic, she struggled for years and her eating behavior did not change as much with the difference of her maintaining a weight that wouldn’t get her medical treatment again.  I thought this time had been shocking enough to our family and really tore a hole that lingered like a dark cloud and you should know better but then I noticed my twin starting with a similar eating behavior. She developed a fully grown bulimic disorder. Needless to say that this shook our family to the very core. The atmosphere was filled with distrust, control, unspoken fear and questions over questions. I started to ask myself how something so pleasurable and beautiful could have so much power over a human being, especially in the obvious face of the damage an eating disorder could cause.  It has been years from now since my twin developed her eating disorder and even though things are not as extreme anymore in terms of purging, I often find her resorting to these old patterns whenever things are getting emotionally difficult and straining. She does not starve herself anymore but her control mechanisms shifted into quite an unhealthy relationship to workouts, tracking and rigid rules.  This was by the time we started to go to University in the same city. I never really noticed that I had gained quite some weight until I saw her figure changing to a very lean and muscular build and me being rather curvy in comparison. Not that I cared by the time, I was still happy with myself but wanted to spend more time with her as she was elbows deep into working out and eating clean. So one of the only ways to reconnect with her was working out together. It worked! We spent much more time together and I also noticed myself changing in the process. It was nice to see my body getting leaner and I wanted to “support” the process by changing my – admittedly not very healthy – eating habits that came with university.  I slowly became obsessed with calories, how many I could eat, how much I needed to work out, which foods were good and which foods weren’t. I felt so ashamed of myself when I discovered how seemingly “unhealthy” I had been eating when all I really did was enjoying good food whenever I wanted.  I started to demonize certain foods, restricted and cut out sugars, junk-food and even eventually certain food groups like carbs. Hell, I was so afraid to have rice with any of my other foods because in my eyes it was way too calorific.  I lost much weight until I was at my desired size but what price did I pay?  I missed out on so much fun as I didn’t allow myself to indulge in delicious foods on social events, I annoyed everyone around me with my clean eating, it severely affected my relationship and friendships, took so much of my time and energy until I felt run-down and so so exhausted.  I started to discover intuitive eating and was fascinated with it from the very beginning although it was hard for me to let go of my old diet behavior. I now have a better relationship with you and occasionally feel like this could really work but then I see my sister (we live together) munching on her salad or not eating until 3 in the afternoon. I see her freaking out over not being able to go to the gym or doing heavy HIIT for hours because she allowed herself to enjoy a night out the night before. And suddenly the cookie in my hand feels like it would add up 100 pounds to my hips, just like I thought back then. She has a very muscular build by now and gets a ton of compliments for it and sometimes if I am honest I feel jealous of it and wonder if it is wrong to have a softer body.  I really try to not let food dictate my life anymore but I cannot help myself when a disordered eating behavior is so very close to you, emotionally and physically. How can I manage to get rid of the little voice telling me that I am not beautiful if I am not muscular like her? How can I better set boundaries for myself in terms of her eating behavior and mine? How do I deal with the struggle of my body gaining weight and me still finding myself desiring to lose it again as I have always been slim and somehow cannot deal with the thought of gaining more. I really wanna move away from food thoughts dictating my day and my still present diet mentality. I want to focus on loving myself and doing what I love. Still, it is so hard sometimes …  Please help me reconnect with you in a healthy way. Love,  Confused and frustrated Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li>Be sure to follow Renee Hamati on Instagram @SensiblyYou</li> <li><a href="https://www.joyn.co/">Joyn Movement Classes for Everybody</a></li> <li>Follow these Instagram Hashtags--#bodyneutrality #fatacceptance #haes #haesig #infinifirst #intuitiveeating #intuitiveeatingofficial</li> <li>HAESCommunity.org</li> <li><a href= "https://www.sizediversityandhealth.org/content.asp?id=76">HAES Principles</a></li> <li><a href= "https://www.sizediversityandhealth.org/content.asp?id=161">HAES Fact Sheet</a></li> <li><a href= "https://www.sizediversityandhealth.org/content.asp?id=207">HAES Expert Guidelines</a></li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitian</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

What is it like to eat with others on your Food Peace™ journey? How do you experience the talk about bodies or exercise or where to go to lunch? Do you find yourself comparing yourself to other people and feeling like a failure in comparison? Is this keeping you stuck? Let's discuss in this week's Love Food Podcast with guest Renee Hamati @SensiblyYou on Instagram. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. I want to learn more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: JulieDillonRD.com/Survey. This episode's Dear Food letter: Dear Food, I have struggled to write this letter for a while now as I couldn’t really think of a good way to organize what went all wrong over the past couple of years. You and I are definitely on better terms by now and I am glad about that. Yet more often than I want to, my past keeps creeping up the back of my head again.  Let me take you back a little, to a time when food had been effortless and easy, enjoyable and pleasurable. I remember that I have always loved you and didn’t really think of any part of you as good or bad. I loved chocolate as much as I loved my broccoli. I had no hard time stopping whenever I was full nor did I give myself a hard time when I overate on occasion. I just shrugged it off and moved on.  I have always been slim since I was a kid and to be honest, I never worried about how my body looked. I loved it for being able to move, to dance, to breathe.  For a little further explanation of the following let me tell you that I have 2 sisters. A twin and an older sister.  We spent much time together as 3 even though my older sister has always been busy with being a good student. Nonetheless we had a good relationship … until over time she grew distant and cold, irritated for seemingly no reason. We noticed her eating behavior changing. Long story short, everything ended with her being so deep into Anorexia that she had to be force-fed in the recovery clinic. Even after her stay in the clinic, she struggled for years and her eating behavior did not change as much with the difference of her maintaining a weight that wouldn’t get her medical treatment again.  I thought this time had been shocking enough to our family and really tore a hole that lingered like a dark cloud and you should know better but then I noticed my twin starting with a similar eating behavior. She developed a fully grown bulimic disorder. Needless to say that this shook our family to the very core. The atmosphere was filled with distrust, control, unspoken fear and questions over questions. I started to ask myself how something so pleasurable and beautiful could have so much power over a human being, especially in the obvious face of the damage an eating disorder could cause.  It has been years from now since my twin developed her eating disorder and even though things are not as extreme anymore in terms of purging, I often find her resorting to these old patterns whenever things are getting emotionally difficult and straining. She does not starve herself anymore but her control mechanisms shifted into quite an unhealthy relationship to workouts, tracking and rigid rules.  This was by the time we started to go to University in the same city. I never really noticed that I had gained quite some weight until I saw her figure changing to a very lean and muscular build and me being rather curvy in comparison. Not that I cared by the time, I was still happy with myself but wanted to spend more time with her as she was elbows deep into working out and eating clean. So one of the only ways to reconnect with her was working out together. It worked! We spent much more time together and I also noticed myself changing in the process. It was nice to see my body getting leaner and I wanted to “support” the process by changing my – admittedly not very healthy – eating habits that came with university.  I slowly became obsessed with calories, how many I could eat, how much I needed to work out, which foods were good and which foods weren’t. I felt so ashamed of myself when I discovered how seemingly “unhealthy” I had been eating when all I really did was enjoying good food whenever I wanted.  I started to demonize certain foods, restricted and cut out sugars, junk-food and even eventually certain food groups like carbs. Hell, I was so afraid to have rice with any of my other foods because in my eyes it was way too calorific.  I lost much weight until I was at my desired size but what price did I pay?  I missed out on so much fun as I didn’t allow myself to indulge in delicious foods on social events, I annoyed everyone around me with my clean eating, it severely affected my relationship and friendships, took so much of my time and energy until I felt run-down and so so exhausted.  I started to discover intuitive eating and was fascinated with it from the very beginning although it was hard for me to let go of my old diet behavior. I now have a better relationship with you and occasionally feel like this could really work but then I see my sister (we live together) munching on her salad or not eating until 3 in the afternoon. I see her freaking out over not being able to go to the gym or doing heavy HIIT for hours because she allowed herself to enjoy a night out the night before. And suddenly the cookie in my hand feels like it would add up 100 pounds to my hips, just like I thought back then. She has a very muscular build by now and gets a ton of compliments for it and sometimes if I am honest I feel jealous of it and wonder if it is wrong to have a softer body.  I really try to not let food dictate my life anymore but I cannot help myself when a disordered eating behavior is so very close to you, emotionally and physically. How can I manage to get rid of the little voice telling me that I am not beautiful if I am not muscular like her? How can I better set boundaries for myself in terms of her eating behavior and mine? How do I deal with the struggle of my body gaining weight and me still finding myself desiring to lose it again as I have always been slim and somehow cannot deal with the thought of gaining more. I really wanna move away from food thoughts dictating my day and my still present diet mentality. I want to focus on loving myself and doing what I love. Still, it is so hard sometimes …  Please help me reconnect with you in a healthy way. Love,  Confused and frustrated Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Be sure to follow Renee Hamati on Instagram @SensiblyYou Joyn Movement Classes for Everybody Follow these Instagram Hashtags--#bodyneutrality #fatacceptance #haes #haesig #infinifirst #intuitiveeating #intuitiveeatingofficial HAESCommunity.org HAES Principles HAES Fact Sheet HAES Expert Guidelines Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitian near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(208) I can't stop comparing myself to others (with Renee Hamati)

How do you push yourself to exercise more with PCOS? Well, I don't think you should--I think your body is trying to tell you something. Listen up to hear what I have to say about movement and PCOS. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul>

How do you push yourself to exercise more with PCOS? Well, I don't think you should--I think your body is trying to tell you something. Listen up to hear what I have to say about movement and PCOS. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. 

(207) PCOS and Exercise

Does anti-diet mean anti-health? Does intuitive eating mean letting go of health? Moving away from diets is not neglecting the evidence, it is using it. It's time to dive into how rejecting diets reunites us with health and dignified care. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Dear Food, My ideas surrounding you have always been related to health. Growing up in a larger body, with a mother who was a physician, had me constantly aware and ashamed of myself. For me, you were always supposed to be something I was conscious of. My own doctor would show me where I was on the growth curve, and constantly telling me that my BMI was unhealthy. These experiences were ingrained in me from a very early age. I was told "you burn more calories sitting up rather than laying down" when watching TV and only provided with "healthy" snacks, snacks that I never wanted. I was told to ignore my cravings and, instead, eat a handful of almonds. My mom and I were always dieting together, for the sake of "health". This quest for health led me to nursing school, hoping to be able to heal my sickness and the sickness of others. This is when I was subconsciously introduced to medicalized fatphobia. The nutrition class I had to take encouraged us to count calories in and count calories out. This only encouraged my obsessive weight loss behavior, getting to a point where I was regularly consuming less than X calories a day and obsessively exercising X days a week. Now that I am in school to become a midwife and also pursuing food peace through intuitive eating, I am much more aware and disturbed by the medicalized fatphobia that I am supposed to take part in. Learning the formula for "ideal body weight" (a real thing that was taught to me in one of my classes), I am "supposed" to be X lbs, a weight I have NEVER reached even with my days of severe restriction. I am learning how to make sure the pregnant people I take care of aren't gaining "too much weight" during their pregnancy and also how a lot of contraceptives are not designed for people in larger bodies. I desperately want to be a practitioner that lives outside the medicalized fatphobia, but I am worried that if I do, I will be shunned by my coworkers and superiors as a bad provider. I'm not sure how to reconcile my understanding of chronic health conditions that are supposedly related to larger bodies and also my desire to follow Health At Every Size principles. Love, Everyday Fighter of the System   Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/36yIMR6">Anti-Diet book</a> (aff)</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Weight stigma</li> <li>Weight cycling</li> <li>Social determinants of health</li> <li>Rally--Food Peace™ principle</li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Does anti-diet mean anti-health? Does intuitive eating mean letting go of health? Moving away from diets is not neglecting the evidence, it is using it. It's time to dive into how rejecting diets reunites us with health and dignified care. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Dear Food, My ideas surrounding you have always been related to health. Growing up in a larger body, with a mother who was a physician, had me constantly aware and ashamed of myself. For me, you were always supposed to be something I was conscious of. My own doctor would show me where I was on the growth curve, and constantly telling me that my BMI was unhealthy. These experiences were ingrained in me from a very early age. I was told "you burn more calories sitting up rather than laying down" when watching TV and only provided with "healthy" snacks, snacks that I never wanted. I was told to ignore my cravings and, instead, eat a handful of almonds. My mom and I were always dieting together, for the sake of "health". This quest for health led me to nursing school, hoping to be able to heal my sickness and the sickness of others. This is when I was subconsciously introduced to medicalized fatphobia. The nutrition class I had to take encouraged us to count calories in and count calories out. This only encouraged my obsessive weight loss behavior, getting to a point where I was regularly consuming less than X calories a day and obsessively exercising X days a week. Now that I am in school to become a midwife and also pursuing food peace through intuitive eating, I am much more aware and disturbed by the medicalized fatphobia that I am supposed to take part in. Learning the formula for "ideal body weight" (a real thing that was taught to me in one of my classes), I am "supposed" to be X lbs, a weight I have NEVER reached even with my days of severe restriction. I am learning how to make sure the pregnant people I take care of aren't gaining "too much weight" during their pregnancy and also how a lot of contraceptives are not designed for people in larger bodies. I desperately want to be a practitioner that lives outside the medicalized fatphobia, but I am worried that if I do, I will be shunned by my coworkers and superiors as a bad provider. I'm not sure how to reconcile my understanding of chronic health conditions that are supposedly related to larger bodies and also my desire to follow Health At Every Size principles. Love, Everyday Fighter of the System   Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Anti-Diet book (aff) Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Weight stigma Weight cycling Social determinants of health Rally--Food Peace™ principle Find an Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(206) What about health and intuitive eating?

PCOS Carb Cravings: It's not a weakness it's a super power. I hope you don't continue to shun them, run from them, or avoid them. Leaning into them gives you insight you can't get anywhere else. Here's what I have to say about PCOS carb cravings. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul>

PCOS Carb Cravings: It's not a weakness it's a super power. I hope you don't continue to shun them, run from them, or avoid them. Leaning into them gives you insight you can't get anywhere else. Here's what I have to say about PCOS carb cravings. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. 

(205) PCOS and Carb Cravings

Do you notice how much bonding happens over diet talk and body bashing? Do you already feel different and rejecting diets makes you feel even more out of place? Guest expert Rachel Millner says, "Community is important" and reminds us to "keep focusing on what we are pursuing: freedom." Listen to more on the latest Love Food Podcast episode. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during February 2020. I want to more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: <a href= "http://juliedillonrd.com/Survey">JulieDillonRD.com/Survey</a>. This episode's Dear Food letter: Dear food,      Hello! I’m so glad we’ve spent some time over the past few years working on our relationship. I grew up in a household with a severly anorexic sister and an eating disordered mom, where you were considered dangerous, addictive, and a symbol of weakness. Though I love my family deeply and in so many ways, before I went to college, I became very fed up with two ideas in particular they used to police me: first, that I must appear feminine, and second, that I must be thin so I can be “healthy” and attractive. Before I left home, and even more after, I experimented with violating both these rules. Years later, I am learning that they are related in ways I never realized.      From my family and society in general, I learned that being thin, talking about restriction, and obsessing over appearances are cornerstones of conventional femininity. So much of what the women in my extended family do together revolves around appearances. On vacation, we go on hikes where we don’t even talk because we don’t want to slow our heart rates for the exercise-tracking watches (I’m the only one without one), and connect and catch up doing hair, makeup, or going to the nail salon, where inevitably boyfriends or the pursuit of them are the thing everyone from the extended family considers common ground for conversation. I don’t relate to so much of this. I consider myself pretty femine, but being gay and avoiding diet culture seem to isolate me. Doing both of them at the same time just compounds this effect: not only am I not traditionally feminine because I’m not straight, I try not to compensate for it by constantly maintaining the southern-charm appearance that my family values so much.      It’s hard, though, food. I feel like such an outsider, and dating women who are thinner than me just makes it harder. My last girlfriend and my current girlfriend are both naturally very thin, and the inner voice that wants to compare my weight and looks to others’ is even louder when the person I’m looking at is a romatic partner. I’m very open about this with women I date, and my girlfriend says she loves me at my exact size (I’m so lucky), but I can’t help but feel jealous. One thing that helped was having sex with women of my own size. I think being queer gives me the unique opportunity to value my own body because I can see a woman who looks like me and think, “she’s about my weight, and I think she’s gorgeous!” Lately, this just isn’t enough for me though. It’s exhausting having to prove my femininity to myself and my family all the time. It’s exhausting having to prove that my weight is okay to myself and my family all the time. I’m a woman with a body that I use to feed, move, and connect - shouldn’t that be enough? I know it should be, but I can’t help but feel shame every time I eat a dessert, and I know it’s damaging our relationship, food. I love my girlfriend so much, but her thinness and genuine innate love of vegetables make me feel comparatively shitty to the point where I am emotionally eating, which just makes me feel worse. I really want to continue along the path to peace with you, food, and I hope someday I can eat and love without fear. Love,      Here, queer, and full of food fear Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://www.rachelmillnertherapy.com/">Rachel Millner</a></li> <li>Instagram mentions: @Shooglet, @The_Queer_Counselor, @SamDylanFinch, @DecolonizingFitness</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Do you notice how much bonding happens over diet talk and body bashing? Do you already feel different and rejecting diets makes you feel even more out of place? Guest expert Rachel Millner says, "Community is important" and reminds us to "keep focusing on what we are pursuing: freedom." Listen to more on the latest Love Food Podcast episode. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during February 2020. I want to more about you! I would love if you could take the 2020 Love Food survey: access it here: JulieDillonRD.com/Survey. This episode's Dear Food letter: Dear food,      Hello! I’m so glad we’ve spent some time over the past few years working on our relationship. I grew up in a household with a severly anorexic sister and an eating disordered mom, where you were considered dangerous, addictive, and a symbol of weakness. Though I love my family deeply and in so many ways, before I went to college, I became very fed up with two ideas in particular they used to police me: first, that I must appear feminine, and second, that I must be thin so I can be “healthy” and attractive. Before I left home, and even more after, I experimented with violating both these rules. Years later, I am learning that they are related in ways I never realized.      From my family and society in general, I learned that being thin, talking about restriction, and obsessing over appearances are cornerstones of conventional femininity. So much of what the women in my extended family do together revolves around appearances. On vacation, we go on hikes where we don’t even talk because we don’t want to slow our heart rates for the exercise-tracking watches (I’m the only one without one), and connect and catch up doing hair, makeup, or going to the nail salon, where inevitably boyfriends or the pursuit of them are the thing everyone from the extended family considers common ground for conversation. I don’t relate to so much of this. I consider myself pretty femine, but being gay and avoiding diet culture seem to isolate me. Doing both of them at the same time just compounds this effect: not only am I not traditionally feminine because I’m not straight, I try not to compensate for it by constantly maintaining the southern-charm appearance that my family values so much.      It’s hard, though, food. I feel like such an outsider, and dating women who are thinner than me just makes it harder. My last girlfriend and my current girlfriend are both naturally very thin, and the inner voice that wants to compare my weight and looks to others’ is even louder when the person I’m looking at is a romatic partner. I’m very open about this with women I date, and my girlfriend says she loves me at my exact size (I’m so lucky), but I can’t help but feel jealous. One thing that helped was having sex with women of my own size. I think being queer gives me the unique opportunity to value my own body because I can see a woman who looks like me and think, “she’s about my weight, and I think she’s gorgeous!” Lately, this just isn’t enough for me though. It’s exhausting having to prove my femininity to myself and my family all the time. It’s exhausting having to prove that my weight is okay to myself and my family all the time. I’m a woman with a body that I use to feed, move, and connect - shouldn’t that be enough? I know it should be, but I can’t help but feel shame every time I eat a dessert, and I know it’s damaging our relationship, food. I love my girlfriend so much, but her thinness and genuine innate love of vegetables make me feel comparatively shitty to the point where I am emotionally eating, which just makes me feel worse. I really want to continue along the path to peace with you, food, and I hope someday I can eat and love without fear. Love,      Here, queer, and full of food fear Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Rachel Millner Instagram mentions: @Shooglet, @The_Queer_Counselor, @SamDylanFinch, @DecolonizingFitness Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(204) How do I fit in without dieting? (with Rachel Millner)

When every cell in your body screams EAT CARBS NOW--that is PCOS cravings. So how do you cut them out? I am here to say: Don't. You don't have to suffer through the cravings. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul>

When every cell in your body screams EAT CARBS NOW--that is PCOS cravings. So how do you cut them out? I am here to say: Don't. You don't have to suffer through the cravings. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. 

(203) PCOS and Carbs/Sugar

Do you have an awareness on why you have a complicated relationship with food yet can't seem to make it right? Do you eat to feel comfort and can't seem to find another way? Do you eat to escape responsibility or reality and worry that you will never stop bingeing? How and why eat is more complicated than it appears. Pull up a chair and listen to our guest expert Christyna Johnson from @EncouragingNutrition. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Dear Food, This is a much needed conversation... I know exactly when our story started to get a little... complicated. It all started a little bit more than a year ago, I was only 14 (yes, right now I am just 15 and a half ). I know exactly why it started: I compared myself to one girl in my class... She was a gymnast, and really muscular. I was just getting to high school and I admired her body. I've always been considered as a "skinny girl", but at the time I started hating my thighs (by the way, I still do...). That same year, I started being more active and I thought that my thighs needed to be slimmer.  Then, I started to do some research on my own by listening to podcasts, watching youtube videos, reading... I did abs every mornings.  I also decided that I wanted to eat "healthy" and I thought that I had to reduce you Food a little bit... I didn't starve myself, I was too scared and too aware for this, but I had some "rules": no bread, no dairy, no dessert everyday, no snacks. At the same period of time, I lost my period, to this day we (doctors, my mother and I) still don't know what caused it because I didn't lose a lot of weight, just X kilos. I didn't restrict but something else started: bingeing. And here is my problem, sweetie. I found, and I still do, get so much comfort through you. I was thinking about you all the time, even in holidays, in school, wherever. It gets a little better when I am busy but I still love you so much... Now, I am much more aware about nutrition, especially gentle nutrition... I eat when I am hungry but sometimes, and it is still very often, I just don't want to stop eating. And I know exactly why: when I am with you, this is my break from school, or a moment with a friend and family and I don't want to get back to reality and to face my "responsibilities" (as a 15 years old teenager, of course). That's why I binge on you. To be honest, I have only felt a few times the real feeling of "I cannot stop eating": I couldn't do anything and I would eat and eat and eat (processed sweet food that I usually don't eat) and then feel so bloated, having heart palpitations and being mentally down. I really don't know how to heal from bingeing on you... The most stupid thing in all of that is that I know why I binge on you and I am aware a lot of things about nutrition but I feel so trapped.. I know you don't want to hurt me but I don't know how to behave with you. With love, hope it will get better between us (I apologize by advance if there are some mistakes: I am french :))  Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/36yIMR6">Anti-Diet book</a> (aff)</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Christyna Johnson on Instagram: @EncouragingNutrition</li> <li>Christyna Johnson's podcast: <a href= "https://encouragingdietitian.com/category/podcast/">Intuitive Eating for the Culture</a> <--her episode on Gentle Nutrition is OUTSTANDING.</li> <li>Christyna Johnson's website: <a href= "https://encouragingdietitian.com/">EncouragingDietitian.com</a></li> <li>French speaking Intuitive Eating information: <a href= "https://www.instagram.com/elyanec_/">https://www.instagram.com/elyanec_/</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

Do you have an awareness on why you have a complicated relationship with food yet can't seem to make it right? Do you eat to feel comfort and can't seem to find another way? Do you eat to escape responsibility or reality and worry that you will never stop bingeing? How and why eat is more complicated than it appears. Pull up a chair and listen to our guest expert Christyna Johnson from @EncouragingNutrition. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Dear Food, This is a much needed conversation... I know exactly when our story started to get a little... complicated. It all started a little bit more than a year ago, I was only 14 (yes, right now I am just 15 and a half ). I know exactly why it started: I compared myself to one girl in my class... She was a gymnast, and really muscular. I was just getting to high school and I admired her body. I've always been considered as a "skinny girl", but at the time I started hating my thighs (by the way, I still do...). That same year, I started being more active and I thought that my thighs needed to be slimmer.  Then, I started to do some research on my own by listening to podcasts, watching youtube videos, reading... I did abs every mornings.  I also decided that I wanted to eat "healthy" and I thought that I had to reduce you Food a little bit... I didn't starve myself, I was too scared and too aware for this, but I had some "rules": no bread, no dairy, no dessert everyday, no snacks. At the same period of time, I lost my period, to this day we (doctors, my mother and I) still don't know what caused it because I didn't lose a lot of weight, just X kilos. I didn't restrict but something else started: bingeing. And here is my problem, sweetie. I found, and I still do, get so much comfort through you. I was thinking about you all the time, even in holidays, in school, wherever. It gets a little better when I am busy but I still love you so much... Now, I am much more aware about nutrition, especially gentle nutrition... I eat when I am hungry but sometimes, and it is still very often, I just don't want to stop eating. And I know exactly why: when I am with you, this is my break from school, or a moment with a friend and family and I don't want to get back to reality and to face my "responsibilities" (as a 15 years old teenager, of course). That's why I binge on you. To be honest, I have only felt a few times the real feeling of "I cannot stop eating": I couldn't do anything and I would eat and eat and eat (processed sweet food that I usually don't eat) and then feel so bloated, having heart palpitations and being mentally down. I really don't know how to heal from bingeing on you... The most stupid thing in all of that is that I know why I binge on you and I am aware a lot of things about nutrition but I feel so trapped.. I know you don't want to hurt me but I don't know how to behave with you. With love, hope it will get better between us (I apologize by advance if there are some mistakes: I am french :))  Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Anti-Diet book (aff) Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Christyna Johnson on Instagram: @EncouragingNutrition Christyna Johnson's podcast: Intuitive Eating for the Culture 

(202) Food helps me escape but I feel trapped (with Christyna Johnson)

Ever wonder why you have to keep going on another diet to treat your PCOS yet they don't seem to help you feel better long term? <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul>

Ever wonder why you have to keep going on another diet to treat your PCOS yet they don't seem to help you feel better long term? Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. 

(201) PCOS and Diet

So you want to make peace with food while dieting and you hear I am against you because of it. I am against not diet culture, not you. Please listen to my letter to you, Dieter. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to subscribe</a> to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/36yIMR6">Anti-Diet book</a> (aff)</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/34fmiCZ">Intuitive Eating book</a> (aff) and <a href="http://intuitiveeating.com/">website</a></li> <li>Find an <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

So you want to make peace with food while dieting and you hear I am against you because of it. I am against not diet culture, not you. Please listen to my letter to you, Dieter. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at checkout for 30% off during the month of February 2020. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to subscribe to the Love Food’s Food Peace Syllabus. Anti-Diet book (aff) Intuitive Eating book (aff) and website Find an Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(200) Dear Dieter--Can we talk?

What if what you've learned about PCOS and weight loss is not true? What if the pursuit of weight loss is not a good solution to promoting health? What if you don't have be smaller to feel better with PCOS? Let's chat about PCOS and weight. I hope it helps you have more informed consent along your PCOS and Food Peace journey. <a href="http://bit.ly/1PuyEID">Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds.</a> This episode is brought to you by my courses: <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/">PCOS and Food Peace</a> and <a href= "http://pcosandfoodpeace.com/dietitians">Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace</a>. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: <ul> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/blog">Julie Dillon RD blog</a></li> <li><a href="http://juliedillonrd.com/">Link to</a> get latest Food Peace Syllabus.</li> <li><a href="https://amzn.to/2ZERYRG">Intuitive Eating</a> (aff) by Tribole and Resch</li> <li><a href="http://www.juliedillonrd.com/6keystofoodpeace/">6 Keys To Food Peace</a></li> <li><a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27825940">Jeanes, Y. M., Reeves, S., Gibson, E. L., Piggott, C., May, V. A., & Hart, K. H. (2017). Binge eating behaviours and food cravings in women with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Appetite, 109(Supplement C), 24–32</a>.</li> <li>Julie on Instagram: <a href= "http://instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian">Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian</a></li> <li>Find <a href="http://www.eddietitians.com/">Eating Disorder Dietitians</a> near you.</li> </ul> Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  <h1><a href="http://getpodcast.reviews/id/1076673018">Click here</a> to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!</h1>

What if what you've learned about PCOS and weight loss is not true? What if the pursuit of weight loss is not a good solution to promoting health? What if you don't have be smaller to feel better with PCOS? Let's chat about PCOS and weight. I hope it helps you have more informed consent along your PCOS and Food Peace journey. Subscribe and leave a review here in just seconds. This episode is brought to you by my courses: PCOS and Food Peace and Dietitians PCOS and Food Peace. You CAN make peace with food even with PCOS and I want to show you how. Use the coupon code 'lovefood' at check out for 30% off. Show Notes: Julie Dillon RD blog Link to get latest Food Peace Syllabus. Intuitive Eating (aff) by Tribole and Resch 6 Keys To Food Peace Jeanes, Y. M., Reeves, S., Gibson, E. L., Piggott, C., May, V. A., & Hart, K. H. (2017). Binge eating behaviours and food cravings in women with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. Appetite, 109(Supplement C), 24–32. Julie on Instagram: Instagram.com/FoodPeaceDietitian Find Eating Disorder Dietitians near you. Do you have a complicated relationship with food? I want to help! Send your Dear Food letter to LoveFoodPodcast@gmail.com.  Click here to leave me a review in iTunes and subscribe. This type of kindness helps the show continue!

(199) PCOS and Weight Loss

Clean eating. Low carb. Low fat. Do this not that. Now what? Eating is getting too stuffy and complicated. Throw open your windows to allow a new stream of health, wellness, and peace. Time to examine your dusty food belief knick-knacks. What if you could write a letter to food? Pen to paper, you hash out the love/hate relationship and food’s undeserving power. Details go back years, to your first childhood diet trying to fit in. How you relate to food chronicles many of your life’s ups and downs. In this letter, you examine your dusty food beliefs and wonder which go in the trash, are for others, and which remain in your heart. What if you wrote this all down and food wrote you back? This is Love, Food. Food behavior expert and host, Julie Duffy Dillon is rolling up her sleeves to get to the bottom of what is really healthy. This award-winning dietitian seen on TLC’s My Big Fat Fabulous Life has a secret: food is not your enemy and your body is tired of the constant attacks. Show topics include: *emotional eating *weight concerns *binge eating *orthorexia *body image *eating disorders *dieting *parenting and food *healthy eating *stress eating *food addiction *mindful eating *non diet approaches Pull up a chair to your dusty kitchen table and set it for a meal. Ask food to sit alongside you and chat over coffee. Or a margarita. You have some reconnecting to do. In that connection is Love, Food. In that conversation is health and peace.

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The Love Food Podcast

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