ROUND 1: Boredom is going to start setting in soon. If you think we dont have a cure for that, you just made a big mistake. Huge. Let’s talk RomComs, folks. ROUND 2: Relax, don’t do it, when you wanna comb through it and get your haircut… At least if you’re in the Navy. They’re letting their grooming standards relax to deal with Coronavirus. ROUND 3: Yes, the times are changin’ but it’d be a lie to say nudie mags haven’t been a huge part of military culture. So its sad news as Playboy has published it’s very last print magazine ever. Bonus - Kate has a nudie mag quiz for Cons & I. ROUND 4: A story is making the rounds about a combat Veteran & his wife having a baby. What’s so interesting about that? The wife and baby are both dolls. ROUND 5: We asked, you answered. How is Coronavirus affecting your units… We can smell the bleach from here.

Zero Blog Thirty

ZBT #248: Fighting Boredom + Nudes

Round 1: Coronavirus lockdowns are in full effect. It’s only been one weekend and boredom is already starting to set in. We are gonna teach you the ancient military method of hurry up and waiting. Round 2: Magnets… How do they work? Not only that, but other stuff is weird too. We are gonna hop right into something not coronavirus related. Round 3: For round number three, we had longtime Stoolie Boris come in to read the round. You’ll remember Boris as the gentleman who shaved my beard in New York a few months ago. He’s been helping us with graphics so take it away Boris. Us pesky Russians are back in the news. Coronavirus be damned. We head to Alaska to check out your most beautiful state. Did we get caught? You’ll have to wait until round three to find out. Round 4: Everything in America is changing which includes military stuff too. Boot camp is delayed. All PCS and TDY moves are halted until May 11th. Some of those spots are worse than others. We took to the zbt platoon to remind us about the worst places you could be on lockdown.

ZBT #247: Hurry Up and Wait

Round 1: Coronavirus hysteria. It’s going down, folks. So we are gonna give you a little advice amd freak out some too. ROUND 2: The GI Bill is a wonderful thing.. Until your school is charged with “erroneous, deceptive, or misleading" practices so the VA terminates new enrollments. ROUND 3: Integrity Violators? In the military? Hard to believe, but some little birdies - AKA you guys - told us about the craziest lies people in your unit ever got caught up in. ROUND 4: Hear the story of a spoooooky Air Force crew that just got awarded for their bravery in 9-hour firefight against ISIS back in 2019. Round 5 doggie bag

ZBT #246: Coronavirus + Integrity Violators

Round #1: Despite what longtime stoolie Ray Finkle would say, the laces were out and the dolphins are in… inside the belly of a C-17 because these specialized bomb-smelling dolphins are headed to the Florida Keys from San Diego. No word yet on Key Largo or Montego. We’ll keep you updated. Round 2: THATS A SPICY MEAT-A-BALL! Soldiers and family members assigned to bases in Italy will no longer be allowed to PCS home, go to professional schools, or couple’s skate at the base roller rink due to fears about the Coronavirus outbreak in Italy. One of those isn't true. We’ll let you think about it and guess! Round 3: That’s right, folks. MORE CORONAVIRUS TALK! This time, however, we are going to praise the good folks of the Coast Guard. The more I think about it, they might be the most useful branch to homeland America. They are constantly in the thick of it even if that thickness comes from the mucus-laden nastiness of the coronavirus. Round 4: Recruiter Tall Tales: we head out to the ZBT platoon on social media to check in and see if the recruiters out there ever lie, cheat, or steal. It should be a short round because honesty is a hallmark of non-commissioned officers. Round 5: A Marine had to take a shit. The Marine wasn't Kate or me.. We’ll tell you her horror story, though. Dont drink coffee while we do if you have a barracks inspection. We dont want nose coffee.. (Which is different than nose beers) to cause you to fail your inspection.

ZBT #245: Bomb Sniffing Dolphins + Lies Your Recruiter Told You

ROUND 1: Kate received an award from the VFW, and we recap how the night went. Spoiler alert, it was great! ROUND 2: PETA is up in arms over an animal that has no arms that our armed forces are eating when they hold it in their arms over their heads to drink their blood! Say that 5 times fast. ROUND 3: Interview with Congressman Will Hurd ROUND 4: Thicc (with two c’s) soldiers are strong soldiers according to a new study, and that’s great news for the ladies out there with a little bit of extra strong on ‘em

ZBT #244: Kate Receives An Award From The VFW + Congressman Will Hurd

Round 1: An Army unit had a DUI over the weekend. Nothing new there. The command went a little bit old school in the punishment. Does unit punishment work for situations like this? Maybe. Probably not. Round 2: America’s newest medal of honor recipient just got promoted to Sergeant Major. Having a SgtMaj with a MOH would be both a blessing and it would STINK. We’ll tell you why. Round 3: We have an agreement in place to leave Afghanistan! Woohoo! America and the Taliban signed the agreement on Friday. Afghanistan isnt on board though. Is that a problem? Round 4: Marine Corps Commandant General Berger is making some big changes and we’re going to tell you about two. One involves the confederate flag and the other involves making the Marine Corps the smartest branch in the DoD. Round 5: In the worst Stolen Valor news of my adult life, Sgt. Slaughter has been outed as a fake which kinda proves that WCW is better than WWE.

ZBT #243: Sgt. Slaughter and 36 Hours of Peace

ROUND 1: China is back in the news but this time it isnt for Coronavirus. They are deploying more than 100k troops to Pakistan. Deployments arent always what they are quacked up to be. ROUND 2: A U.S. soldier in South Korea has tested positive for COVID-19 AKA Coronavirus. We hope they’re ok but also imagine they are getting absolutely roasted by their pals right now. ROUND 3: Women are in the news for both British & American military forces this week as they make great strides. As per usual the haters are out in full force. ROUND 4: We are pretty pro America on this podcast so when a national American media company shits down our throat, we take notice. NPR wrote a piece about America losing an important war. We dont take that lightly. ROUND 5: Two British sailors were awarded for bravery at Kensington Palace. An award ceremony just slaps different in a castle, folks. Round 6: Cons sits down with Army Football captain Cole Christensen to talk about the new policy allowing Academy graduates to go pro and how it came about because of a random comment in the Oval Office

ZBT #242: Big Dinghy Energy

Round 1: Airmen in Okinawa are authorized to wear shorts on the flight line. Is this a big deal to anyone besides Kate? Shes furious about it and I'm not sure why. Round 2: The Taliban, Afghan Forces, and the United States have gone into a week-long reduction of violence agreement. We’re gonna check in on the first day! Round 3: Speaking of the Taliban, what in the fuck are you doing, New York Times? The squad is going to get into the mind-binding decision that resulted in having a Taliban leader write an opinion piece in the New York Times. Round 4: One of the best parts about deployments is the deployment video. Choosing a song can be tough. We’ll rate a popular one today. Mr. Red White and Blue Round 5: Recently, a 62 year old veteran broke a planking record. He held the position for nearly 8 hours. We’ll let you guess what school he went to. It’ll make Connor happy and Connor deserves happiness too.

ZBT #241: Taliban Should Be Tali-BANNED From The New York Times

ROUND 1: There are about 27 Fast & Furious movies now, but we’re especially excited for the next one - Fast & Furious, Syria Drift which is inspired by true events this week as a Russian vehicle tried to go full Vin Diesel against a convoy of US MRAPs. ROUND 2: How do you guys like your coffee? With piss? Well that’s super weird. But if true, you guys are gonna love what a disgruntled Airman is in trouble for. ROUND 3: A survey has come out telling us what states have the most folks enlisting. Is YOUR state one of the most patriotic? ROUND 4: We all know bureaucratic red tape & the military go together like peas & carrots, and that’s especially true for a Marine Recruit who has been in the brig for almost 2 years now, but… without any charges or trial thus far? ROUND 5: We’ll close out the show with some final thoughts on Iwo Jima and what the legacy means to us.

ZBT #240: Get Run Off The Road, BITCH @Russia

The ZBT squad went out to Colorado Springs for some hockey goofin and had a great time. The Air Force Academy hosted the NHL Stadium Series, and the Barstool Air Force viceroy gave us a tour of campus beforehand. Sitting just outside the Rockies, we give our honest opinions on our day at the AFA.

Official Air Force Academy Review

ROUND 1: A Texas county sheriff’s candidate loooved talking about his time in the SEALs, Green Berets & Airborne rangers, but it turns out he was never with any of them… and it’s even more of a heartbreaker when it turns out his opponent did the same thing! ROUND 2: It’s Valentine’s Day!!! Which is great news because that means chocolate will be ½ off at the PX tomorrow, and even better news since listeners showered each other with love notes & we’re gonna read those sweet, sweet suckers today. ROUND 3: Wouldn’t be Valentine’s Day without a little heartbreak, too, and it looks like the Phillipines might be breaking up with the USA & ending a major security pact that allows us to train in their country. ROUND 4: People on deployments dont cease being horny. Some of our listeners have never been on a field op, deployment, or movement while in a romantic relation. We’ll take some advice from the salt dogs of WW2 and then put our spin on sexting while deployed. ROUND 5: An Air Force pilot sent a ring to outer-fucking-space in a marriage proposal that will put you all to SHAME!

ZBT #239: Happy Valentine's Day Staff Sarnt

ROUND 1: The military is equipped to handle anything in the world. Doesnt matter what it is. We are experts at crises and if you dont realize that, you have a big dump that’s infected with coronavirus in your pants. ROUND 2: A former Navy diver has been kidnapped in Afghanistan while working for a US contracting firm. The news and the state department have been oddly quiet about efforts to get him back. ROUND 3: The Army is trying to find a way that your dick skinners can stay warm without mittens or your hands in your nasty ass pockets. ROUND 4: What military moments send shivers down your spine, pricklies on your neck, & goosebumps down your arms? We asked, you answered… ROUND 5: This weekend a Medal of Honor recipient went on Fox and Friends to trash LtCol Vindman’s career and reputation. Is this who we are going to be as a veteran/military community?

ZBT #238: Chow Thieves & Spotlighters + Military Goosebumps

ROUND 1: Our friends the Russian Orthodox ministers are blessing babies, marriages, and now… NUCLEAR BOMBS. Good idea or bad idea? ROUND 2: We’ve all been in staring contests, but the one happening overseas right now is slightly more serious... Russian contractors in Syria are getting into standoffs with US troops and tensions are high after some potentially dangerous encounters ROUND 3: A spouse surprise at SOTU address had many in tears, but for a lot of veterans watching it was bittersweet after nearly 2 decades of war ROUND 4: One employee at the Little Rock VA improperly gave out $311,000 in disability payments to 11 vets after miscalculating claims, and those veterans affected get to keep the money. Is this employee the Robin Hood of the system? Or just really bad at their job? ROUND 5: Sources believe North Korea is close to completing a submarine with nuke capabilities, though sources also believe this sub would be ‘very noisy and easy to spot’.. So there’s that

ZBT #237: Bless Deez Nukes

Round 1: Coronavirus Safety Brief: Grab your first line supervisor, because Coronavirus is in the United States and we’re having a safety stand-down. Round 2: A real-life Top Gun moment led to one Marine commander being relieved from his F18 squadron post. Round 3: A dude living in Arizona was one of the main leaders of Al Qaeda. Yeah. That Al Qaeda. Round 4: Some absolute legends were on the field for the Super Bowl. 4 100-year-old veterans participated in the coin toss. We’ll tell you about one of those men and then take a walk down Super Bowl Memory lane.

ZBT #236: Al-Qaeda In Arizona

ROUND 1: Wanna be Platoon Sergeant for the day? Apparently for one Army MP Unit all you gotta do is win a bet on Facebook.. ROUND 2: A segment of Antiques Roadshow went viral this week after an Air Force veteran found out a watch he ordered through the Exchange 40 years ago is worth nearly $1M… ROUND 3: We asked the ZBT listeners to tell us the bootiest boot things they did when they were new-boot goofin’ and my God… you guys are NERDS. But that’s ok, because so were we… ROUND 4: Kate interviews Daniel Sharp from @pop_smoke_official account and he shares some words of wisdom about mental health, taking risks to follow your own path, and more ROUND 5: Everyone who has served goes through moments where they absolutely hate it. Unlike one airmen, most don’t fake a kidnapping and light amnesia in order to get a discharge.

ZBT #235: What's The Bootest Thing You've Ever Done? ft. Pop Smoke

From bombs, bullets, and bad guys to politics, pop culture and all things problematic: Zero Blog Thirty is the stories you might know told from a slightly different perspective that was forged through war, wit, and wounds.

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